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bonesmakenoise:

theweepingtimelord:

Lembas Bread (Lord of the Rings “authentic” Elvish bread)

Ingredients: 

 2 ½ cups of flour
1 tablespoon of baking powder
¼ teaspoon of salt
½ cup of butter
1/3 cup of brown sugar
1 teaspoon of cinnamon
½ teaspoon honey
2/3 cup of heavy whipping cream
½ teaspoon of vanilla

Directions:

Preheat oven to 425F. Mix the flour, baking powder and salt into a large bowl. Add the butter and mix with a well till fine granules (easiest way is with an electric mixer). Then add the sugar and cinnamon, and mix them thoroughly.

Finally add the cream, honey, and vanilla and stir them in with a fork until a nice, thick dough forms.

Roll the dough out about 1/2 in thickness. Cut out 3-inch squares and transfer the dough to a cookie sheet.Criss-cross each square from corner-to-corner with a knife, lightly (not cutting through the dough).

Bake for about 12 minutes or more (depending on the thickness of the bread) until it is set and lightly golden.

***Let cool completely before eating, this bread tastes better room temperature and dry. Also for more flavor you can add more cinnamon or other spices***

as someone who has baked these A LOT

They are REALLY GOOD

and I am reblogging this because I KEEP LOSING MY RECIPE 

WHY DO THEY ALWAYS SLICE THEIR PALM TO GET BLOOD. do you know how many nerve endings are in your hand?!?! why don’t they ever cut the back of their arm or their leg or something omfg

me everytime a character in a movie has to get a few drops of their blood for some ritual bullshit  (via jtoday)

WHILE WE’RE AT IT, why do people try to cross those skinny bridges over lava/chasms/whatever by walking upright. IT’S CALLED CENTER OF GRAVITY. get on your hands and knees and crawl across that thing. HUG IT. SCOOT YOUR BUTT ACROSS. “but i look stupid!” lalalala but we’ll avoid that ~dramatic moment~ where you almost fall over and die because your damn fucking self wanted to look COOL

(via jtoday)

and stop yanking IV lines out of your arms the minute you wake up in the hospital 

(via panconkiwi)

That is a broadsword, why are you fencing with it

(via gallifrey-feels)

Shoot him damnit. You have a gun. Win! Kill him! No! Don’t give him a speech!

(via mhd-hbd)

Why are you asking if somebody is in your house when it halloween, you’re home alone, half naked, stupid as fuck and there’s voices coming from inside your house. RUN, CALL THE POPO AND DON’T LOOK BACK!

(via summerchild-madeofstone)

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